A Reminder to Like Our Husbands
But you can find them both when you look hard enough. You can find them when you think back to the sick days and the late nights and the belly laughs.
We find the like that leads to the love when we remember that God not only likes us, but he likes our husbands too. He likes them despite the weird mouth noises they make, the way they forget to take the trash out, and the way they leave their dirty clothes in the floor.
When you remember how God feels about the man in front of you, it helps you shift your own feelings for him.
Why Liking Your Husband Matters
If everyone falls short of the glory of God like Romans 3:23 says, then we can’t expect our husbands to be perfect.
Our perfect Jesus came to die for us and our imperfect sins and to remind us that we can like people for their imperfections because that’s what he did for us and that’s what he does for us.
If love and like were based off of perfection, none of us would make the cut.
But God so loved the world full of imperfect people like me, you, and the men we married, that he gave his only Son. John 3:16, right? I wonder if we’ve heard the verse so many times that we forget its power.
He chose us and gave us his Son despite the sins we’ve committed, the times we’ve forgotten him, and the way we leave our messes out for him to take care of.
If he can forgive our imperfections, can’t we do the same for our husbands?
How to Like Your Husband, Not Just Love Him
Allowing our husbands to make mistakes without shaming them for every wrong step shows them grace and points them to Jesus.
“There is therefore now no condemnation for those who are in Christ Jesus.” Romans 8:1 (ESV)
We can walk away from the temptation to condemn and step into the willingness to forgive as wives after God’s heart.
We can thank God for the times he loved us when we felt unlovable, and ask him to fill us with the power to do the same for our husbands.
I have been praying through this in my own marriage and taking steps to walk it out. Instead of blowing up on him for leaving his clothes on the bathroom floor yet again, I give him grace, thank God for who he is, and throw them in the hamper.
Rather than shaming him for “not talking enough” at the dinner party, I remember that God created him on purpose for a purpose and his quiet demeanor is one of the reasons I fell in love with him.
We can resist falling into the enemy’s trap of beginning to despise the qualities we once found charming. And we can press in and press on to fight for love and marriage all for the glory of God.
Wife Step: Next time your husband does something that bothers you, pause and thank God for three other things your husband does that delights you.
Kaitlin is a wife, author, speaker, and coach who loves words, good coffee, and traveling to new cities. Her favorite places include airports, hotel rooms, and bookstores. Kaitlin and her husband Caleb live in Huntsville, AL and serve at Church of the Highlands. She never meets a stranger and is a sucker for brunch dates. She hopes everyone who meets her sees Jesus in her eyes and feels a little lighter when they leave her presence. You can say hi to Kaitlin on social media at @kaitlinchappellrogers on Instagram, Pinterest, and Facebook, @kchaprogers on Twitter, or on her website at kaitlinchappellrogers.com!