5 Truths to Recenter Your Marriage
In the downtime brought on by a worldwide pandemic, I’ve had a lot of time to reflect and a lot of time to be in close quarters with my husband.
There’s no doubt the enemy has been attacking marriages like never before, but I’m also certain God has been growing marriages like never before. And God’s plan always prevails.
As I’ve taken a step back during the worldwide pandemic to look at my marriage and how I can steward it well, I’ve noticed some key truths that create and sustain the marriage we desire.
Five truths to recenter your marriage:
- Quality time alone and together is key. Getting in your alone time in allows you to fill up so you can pour out. Get close to God in those moments so you can have more of Him and less of you in your marriage. And then spend real, alone time with your man. Put your phones away and share a meal or snuggle up and watch a movie. Whatever you do, be intentional and connect your heart to his.
- Slowing down creates space for intimacy. When we take time to pause, we see our spouses in a new light. We start to notice the things they do for us that show they care. We remember the quirks that made us fall in love. Our attraction grows when we stop running and stand still.
- Sabbath isn’t just for you; it’s for your partner, too. Sabbath rest is so important that God made it a commandment. Not only does it allow you to recharge, you’ll notice a refresh in your marriage too. When you have taken the time to get real rest in God alone, it will show in your marriage in ways you may have never seen.
- Shared habits are healthy. You and your spouse may be like me and mine — we have very different interests and different hobbies. But when we find something we mutually love to do together like working out or traveling or watching a certain show, it really changes the game. Common ground breeds connection.
- Fighting doesn’t mean you’re failing. Don’t get discouraged if you disagree with your man. We all do it and we will all continue to do it until The Lord calls us home. We are human and that’s just life. But we can practice “fighting well” and grow from our mistakes. You aren’t a failure if you fight, but you do have a great opportunity to make an adjustment and improve your relationship by learning from the argument.
These five truths really have helped me recenter my marriage. Taking the time to tweak what’s off and put new practices into place acts like an oil change for our marriage.
We operate a lot smoother when we are more like docked ships than ships passing in the night. And you’ve likely noticed it’s not so much about the amount of time spent connecting, but about the quality and connection built during the time you have. Put the phones down, sit up, and look into each other’s eyes and connect.
God has shown us so much about who we are, separately and together, over the past few weeks. It really is so much easier to hear Him when we slow down and get still.
How is God challenging you to rethink and recenter your marriage? In what ways is He asking you to make changes to prioritize your time with your husband?
Wife Step: Looking at the five truths above, which will you work on this week? Write it down and talk with your husband about your desire to create a deeper connection in your marriage.
Kaitlin is a wife, author, speaker, and coach who loves words, good coffee, and traveling to new cities. Her favorite places include airports, hotel rooms, and bookstores. Kaitlin and her husband Caleb live in Huntsville, AL and serve at Church of the Highlands. She never meets a stranger and is a sucker for brunch dates. She hopes everyone who meets her sees Jesus in her eyes and feels a little lighter when they leave her presence. You can say hi to Kaitlin on social media at @kaitlinchappellrogers on Instagram, Pinterest, and Facebook, @kchaprogers on Twitter, or on her website at kaitlinchappellrogers.com!