What Every Wife Wants

Buried deep below the cued public displays of happy faces lived an ugly honest: I wasn’t happy.

I knew the fairytale marriage didn’t exist – I didn’t even want that. I knew I wouldn’t get swept away for surprises or for romantic trips to far-away tropical islands. I knew I married a stable, intelligent, safe man. I expected no unexpected.

However – I still longed for a deep love. Something I’d never had before. And I wanted it with my husband.

I wanted what every wife wants – to be deeply loved in a way that words are incapable of describing. A love alive. One you can feel. Magnetic. I wanted my husband to be enthralled with me. Excited about me. I wanted him to boast about me. Pursue me. Provide assurance and validation.

And after years of fighting to get my husband to love me in this powerful way, it dawned on me. He never would.

Don’t get me wrong, my husband sure loved me – but there was always a deeper love I longed to have. 

How about you? Can you relate?

What Every Wife Wants – A Love Alive

Our husbands aren’t able to love us in the way our hearts yearn to be loved – not because they don’t love us, but because they aren’t able to love us in this way. They were not created with the ability to provide us with this love that gives us new life, purpose, identity, and worth.

Only Jesus can.

What took me years to learn is that growing our happiness in marriage is not found in our spouse. Our happiness in marriage grows as our understanding grows that God is the only One who can give us the love that our hearts desire. 

Our husbands weren’t designed to be what only God can be.

Every wife wants a love alive in marriage. This type of constant, consistent, overwhelming love comes when you receive the love that only your Father can give you. And then, extending this love toward your husband.

What every wife wants, she can get. The trick is to release what you expect, what you hide, or what you haven’t give to God. Give it all to God and trust Him with all of your life and your heart. Receive God’s grace, love, and peace. Then love alive, and give the gift to your spouse.

Wife Step: Commit to this statement: I release my husband from having to be for me what I can only receive from God.

Amanda Davison is on a mission to share how her education in counseling and God’s word changed her marriage. Her goal is for women to commit to living their lives convinced of God’s love for them and love others from this awesome overflow. She is The Wife Coach, a Speaker, and Author, and Founder of A Wife Like Me. Amanda also works as the Director of Assimilations at The Naz church in Fergus Falls, MN, where her and her husband lead the Marriage Mentor Team. Her favorite ministry is inside her home where she is the wife to a farmer and mom to three! She looks forward to hearing from you and hopes you will join with her on the journey of learning to love God’s people well here at A Wife Like Me and at The Wife Coach.