What to do in The Wait to be a Wife Again

While walking through my divorce I surrounded myself with with a group of seasoned Christian women to pray for me and guide me.

Sadly, after my divorce was finalized and I got a glimpse of a new freedom, I threw wisdom to the wind and chose pleasure during a time when healing was needed. I wanted so badly to find love again.

There is a real temptation – married or not, to pursue what’s pleasurable instead of purposeful.

Turn to the other man that tells you nice things.

Over-indulge with food, or shopping, or Netflix.

Mask the feelings with a substance.

Gossip, judge, or emasculate.

I knew that what I was choosing wasn’t God’s best, but deep inside, I didn’t believe I was worthy of His best because I’d already failed at marriage.  

Can you relate?

Walking through a divorce has a way of making you feel damaged. As if you aren’t worthy, enough, or lovable. All are lies.  

But something can happen in the midst of feeling broken and alone.  It is here that we are positioned perfectly for God to begin rebuilding our lives.  Sometimes when we fall flat on our backs, we and finally decided to look up and reach for His hand.  

Of course, it hads been there all along.  

I started praying again – not just generic prayers, but prayers that came from the innermost parts of me. “I want to be all yours.  Break my heart for what breaks yours.  Take anything from me that is not of you.  Use me. I’ll go anywhere. I’ll do anything.”  

This went on for two years.  

My yearning to be a wife again and to have more children did not let up, but I did my best to keep my eyes fixed on Jesus.  

When I least expected it, the Lord brought David into my life.  With him came 4 more children, and we had our first together this year (yes, that’s a grand total of 7)!  

What to do in The Wait to be a Wife Again

The Lord writes the most beautiful stories when we allow Him to hold the pen.  It may seem that by taking time to heal and be restored that you are missing out on something.  

The truth is, you are only missing out on things you aren’t meant to have.  Trust God to have your best interest at heart.  Wait.  Seek Him.  And be confident that He will bring you just the right husband at just the right time.

Wife Step:  Dream with God about what your future husband is like- his character, his personality, his passions and desires.  Begin to pray for him and vow not settle for anything less than God’s very best.

Elizabeth Oschwald is a freelance writer, blogger, and joy-seeker.  She lives in central Illinois in an ever-improving rustic farmhouse with her husband and seven children.  They are a blended family, which means the journey she pictured for her life and the one she’s found herself on are definitely different.  But it also means she knows firsthand how God takes broken things and makes them beautiful. She loves to write transparently about their raw and real family life, her experiences in single motherhood, and how Jesus can add joy in every season.  You can connect with her at www.addingjoy.com, on Facebook, and Instagram.