The knight in shining armor rushes in on the white horse.  Tenderly, he swoops the lovely young maiden up onto his horse while kissing her ever so gently without missing a step with the galloping stallion.

And off they ride, into the sunset, living their happily ever after life.

This used to be us. But now, this is NOT us.

Time passes, and reality begins.  Now what? The knight in shining armor leaves the mess of the white horse for you to clean up.  The knight rushes out the door to work and barely offers, “see you later”, let alone the pause for any thoughtful kiss.  The sunset has faded to a gloomy gray groundhog day resulting in a boring routine.

He was supposed to make your lives exciting (remember the white horse).

He was supposed to make you feel ever so loved.

He was supposed to never miss dinner.

He was supposed to never miss your cue of need for a little extra attention.

But he didn’t.

But he hasn’t.

But he wouldn’t.

But he can’t.

But he isn’t intended to.

And before you know it, these declarations morph into:

He never makes plans for an exciting day.

He never makes me feel loved.

He always has to be told when I’ve had a bad day.

He always ignores my need for a hug.

The dangerous ‘always’ and ‘never’ statements – often used though rarely true.

Would you agree?  Few words, actions, even feelings, are ALWAYS or NEVER true, right? Yet we think them and say them, doing damage to our hearts and relationships.

What if we simply began by refusing to use the words, ‘always’ and ‘never’?

What if we recognized that we didn’t marry a flawless knight in shining armor?

What if we remembered that he actually didn’t marry a perfect princess?

What if we agree that neither of us can wear the fairytale wardrobe, at least not for very long?

Perfect in every way? This is most certainly NOT us.

Two flawed people who chose to come together in a covenant called marriage? This is us.

Let the peace of Christ rule in your hearts, since as members members of one body you were called to peace.  And be thankful.

Wife step:  Speak these words to yourself:  This IS us. And I am so thankful.

Saying yes to Jesus in walking by faith has charted an unexpectedly challenging, joy-filled journey for Susan Wilder. From preschool teacher to writer, speaker, blogger, her sweetest moments come through encouraging women to seek God first and realize the hope we have in following Jesus. Tender love for her husband, Frank, daughters Katie, Kellie, and Mollie, son Clay, sons-in-law Chris, Tim and Tolliver drive her hobbies of cooking and reading. The title of Mimi to four grandboys is more precious than ever imagined. Just ask, she’ll tell you all about them. Susan currently serves as the Women’s Ministry Leader at Southeast Christian Church (Crestwood Campus) in Louisville, Kentucky.  Blog: www.byfaithandcoffee.com