All Wives

How Giving Your First Can Change Your Marriage – Kaitlin Chappell Rogers

January 8, 2020

How Giving Your First Can Change Your Marriage

Maybe you’re with me in finding it difficult to give your first to God — your first 15 minutes, the first day of your week, the first of your paycheck, and the first of your marriage.


You probably hear it all the time. “Spend the first 15 minutes of your day with God.” “Go to the throne before your phone.” “Say a prayer before your feet hit the floor.” 


I fully agree with all these statements, but I don’t think they’re always as easy as they sound. My brain immediately goes to scroll through Instagram after I turn my alarm off in the mornings, so I’m trying to train it to put the phone down and pray. I have narcolepsy so waking up early to read The Bible is physically difficult for me. Tithing my paycheck has become routine for me, but I had to train my brain to give God back what He is letting me use. 


When life is busy and the days fly by, how can we ensure our future days will look any different than the past?  The same goes for our time and our days and our relationships.


God has given us marriage as a gift, so how do we give the first of it back to Him?


It begins with how we spend our time. Our schedules directly reflect the statuses of our souls. By beginning our day in The Word and in prayer, we set ourselves up to give God the first of everything.


God has given us The Bible as the answer to every problem, the guide to every situation, and the healing balm to every hurt. He lays out marriage perfectly and tells us exactly what it should look like. 


Two are better than one, because they have a good return for their labor: If either of them falls down, one can help the other up. But pity anyone who falls and has no one to help them up. Also, if two lie down together, they will keep warm. But how can one keep warm alone? Though one may be overpowered, two can defend themselves. A cord of three strands is not quickly broken.” Ecclesiastes 4:9-12 (NIV)


We are better with our husbands, and our marriage is better with God.


Praying with your husband is so important, but spending time alone with God is vital in building up your own faith so you can stand strong beside your man. He might need to borrow your faith sometimes. Your children might need to borrow your faith sometimes. You are the mother of your family whether you have given birth or not, and God honors that title. Submit to the Father so you can be a life-giving mother.


Soaking up God’s presence, bathing in His word — that is what sets you up to respect your husband, love him through hard times, and encourage him lovingly. We can’t do this on our own, ladies. We have to sit at our Savior’s feet and get instructions.


Maybe your husband doesn’t spend time with God right now. Don’t give up on him. You never know what your relationship with God is modeling for him.


“Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives.” 1 Peter 3:1 (ESV)


Without a word. We don’t always have to use our words to share our hearts with our husbands. Set that alarm. Rise early to seek God. Your husband will notice, and God will work on His soul.


Wife Step: Make it a goal to wake up 30 minutes early every morning for two weeks to pray and read The Word. Keep a journal to document what you learn and how God speaks to you about your life and your marriage each day.

Kaitlin is a newlywed striving to be a strong half of a Kingdom team with her hunk of a husband. She is a lover of words, good coffee, and exploring new cities. Her favorite places include airports, hotel rooms, and bookstores and she has yet to meet a stranger she doesn’t like. Kaitlin is addicted to shopping, yoga, and brunch and couldn’t make it a single day without her dream-supporting family and best friends. She hopes everyone who meets her sees Jesus in her eyes and feels a little lighter when they leave her presence. You can say hi to Kaitlin on social media at @kchaprogers on Instagram and Twitter, @kaitlinchappellrogers on Facebook, or on her website at!


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