God’s Plan For Becoming One
As an abstract thinker, I soared in geometry in school. However, those theorems in algebra threw me for a loop, and I needed help to survive that class.
But raise your hand if you mastered basic arithmetic? I’m imaging wife-hands raised everywhere! Or let’s back up a bit, if you’re anything like the Founder of A Wife Like Me, who doesn’t know the difference between geometry, algebra, and arithmetic, you are not alone!
But play along with me. What’s the only way two of anything becomes one?
We take one away: (2-1=1).
Yet, in God’s marriage math class, Scripture teaches us a whole new way that two become one.
“From the beginning of the world, God made them man and woman. Because of this, a man is to leave his father and mother and is to live with his wife. The two will become one. So they are no longer two, but one.” Mark 10:6-8 NLV.
Becoming one in marriage:
- First, we leave parents. While parents and extended family members may offer support and encouragement, a husband and wife will struggle to become “one” unless we intentionally leave these parent-child ties behind, and the influence our parents once held over us.
It doesn’t mean we never again turn to a parent for advice or support. It does mean our new normal is husband-wife ties. After God, we become the main and top influence, support, and encouragement in each other’s lives.
- Next, we live together as husband and wife. We dwell together as a couple. We make a home under one roof. And we build a home in our hearts as one unit.
- Finally, we become one in body, soul, and spirit. How?
- We become one in body by the sexual union. Are we intentionally engaging in oneness through the act of sex in our marriage?
- We become one in soul as soul-mates in sync with life issues and family living. It’s two people unified for one purpose of glorifying God through our lives and leading others to know Him.
- We become one in spirit through shared spiritual values and connecting with God.
- “Me” steps aside for “we.” To really become one, we take away the self-focused mindset of “me,” while focusing on the team concept of “we.” This makes for a marriage math equation: 2-1=1.
But what if your husband isn’t a believer? How do you become one in soul and spirit? Pray for him to not only accept Christ as Lord, but to also see the connection you have with God. Live out your faith in front of him.
In the meantime, practice unity and oneness in every area you can right now, today. In sexual intimacy, emotional connection, family living, parenting, and doing life together.
Oneness in marriage paints a picture of the bride of Christ, the church. Jesus taught His followers to be one as He and the Father are one. And this is the same image of marriage God wants us to learn in marriage math class.
Our goal in marriage oneness becomes a whole new math equation based on addition, not subtraction: 1+1+1=1.
Say what? Husband + Wife + Jesus = One.
Marriage with Jesus added in becomes more firm in oneness than ever!
Wife Step: Ask these reflective questions. Have I ever in the past, and am I now, practicing leaving and living? Is my husband my top and main influence, support, and encouragement after God? Am I all these things to him? Is my heart a home for our marriage as one unit for a unified purpose? Do I add Jesus into our marriage on a regular basis?
Karen Friday is a pastor’s wife and women’s ministry leader. As an award-winning writer and avid speaker, she loves words and God’s Word. For over a decade, she has balanced the busy life of church ministry with working from her home office in marketing where she is frequently referred to as Girl Friday. A blogger, Karen “Girl” Friday engages a community every week, Hope is Among Us. She has published a number of articles and devotions in both print and online media, and is currently working on her first book. Karen’s writing connects family life experiences, Christian ministry, and real life scenarios as women to the timeless truths of Scripture. Vulnerable about her own marriage journey, Karen knows life never gets more real than as a wife. Karen and her husband Mike have two grown children and a grandson. The entire family is fond of the expression, “TGIF: Thank God it’s Friday.” They owe Monday an apology.
Visit her blog at KarenGirlFriday.com