Dear Wife, He Sees You
I was on my way to church, gripping the steering wheel like I was hanging on for dear life. The girls woke up cranky. The oldest refused to wear the outfit I picked out and the littlest pooped all the way up and out of her diaper. There was not one but two outfit changes prior to leaving the house.
On our drive, the frazzled piece of hair that had slipped out of my ponytail refused to stay out of my face no matter how hard I tried to blow it away. My yet again failed attempt of waking up early, curling my hair and ironing my clothes drained the last ounce of positivity I had in me. Here I was, with bad hair, cranky kids, and a child full of poo.
Rough start to the day.
Actually it had been a rough week, month, even year. The transition of one child to two was a bit more than I had bargained for. I vowed to let my husband have it when he got back from his business trip. We arrived at the church parking lot. I parked, kept my hands on the steering wheel and stared straight ahead.
I needed a minute.
Taking a deep breath I put the stray hair back into place, again, and climbed out of the car, and slapped a smile on my face just like the clown we saw at the park the day before. I held my head upright with one little on my hip and the other little hand in hand.
With my painted-on smile I was holding back the tears. I dropped the girls off at the kids area and headed to the worship center to find the closest empty seat, all the while wondering if anyone really even cared.
Did anyone see me?
Does anyone care?
Does God see me?
Lord, do you see me?
The pressures of mothering and trying to be the best I could be for my beautiful littles seemed like an enormous task that I wasn’t qualified to handle. And not only that, I wanted to be a good wife.
I wanted to matter. I wanted everything that I did at home to count for something.
Most important, I wanted to make a difference. I so badly wanted to be seen.
“Five sparrows are sold for two pennies, aren’t they? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God. Why, even all the hairs on your head have been counted! Stop being afraid. You are worth more than a bunch of sparrows.” Matthew 10:29-31
Dear wife, God sees you.
He knows the length of every precious hair on your precious little head.
He knows your thoughts, your hurts, your cries.
He sees every tear. Not only does he see them, he bottles them up.
He sees every hurtful word that passes through your ears and makes its way into your heart.
He sees the trauma you went through as a child that still affects you today.
He sees your effort in trying to be the best mother that you can possibly be for the tiny little ones that He has gifted you with.
He sees your love and devotion to your spouse when you feel it’s not returned.
He sees you.
And you matter.
Do you get that? I know you hear it. But do you get it? Are you letting it sink in?
You don’t have to try so hard. Bad days are inevitable. We will have them.
But God is near in the good and the bad and we can lean on Him and trust what His word says.
So, chin up buttercup. You are loved, and you are precious. You are seen. And you matter.
Wife Step: Read and write out Matthew 10:29-31 and tape it up where you’ll see it often.
Shannon Geurin is a wife, mother, writer and speaker; but most of all she’s a fighter. She has learned what it takes to fight for her marriage and family. She is deeply passionate about empowering women to rise up through their circumstances and fight in order to find their greatest calling. Shannon loves serving an actively engaged “Fiercely His” community via her website www.shannongeurin.com. Her authentic, genuine style and courage to speak the truth is a breath of fresh air to her readers and is one of her greatest qualities. An Oklahoma girl at heart with the accent and “y’alls” to prove it, she currently resides in the beautiful mountains of Colorado. She graduated with a nursing degree from the University of Oklahoma, but spends her time sipping coffee, writing and doing what she loves most, taking care of her crazy family. Shannon has been married for more than 25 years to her husband John, and is Mom to two spirited daughters, Alex and Averee.